Xbox Live Ads (Language Warning)

This is going to be a little more “bloggish” than usual. By which I mean it’s going to be complaining at no one in particular and contain a dosage of colorful language. Ye have been warned.

So, like most of you who connect your Xbox 360 to the internet, I pay for the Gold service. That’s $60 a year. Good price, for sure. And with that I get online game play. That’s pretty much it. Microsoft objects though. They say I get a bunch more features! Like:

- Multiplayer games: Invite your friends into a multiplayer match and compete against each other or play co-op through expansive adventures.
- Marketplace: Gold members get early and exclusive access to select game add-ons, demos, trailers, videos, and more.
- TrueSkill matchmaking: For every ranked game you play, TrueSkill finds the best match for your skill level.
- Parties: Invite a group of friends into an Xbox LIVE Party, then you can all join games and play and chat together.
- Gamer feedback: Use the feedback system to select players you want to play with (or avoid) the next time you’re online.
- Watch Netflix movies: Xbox LIVE Gold members who also belong to Netflix can watch Netflix’s extensive library of streaming movies and TV shows right on their console at no additional charge.

The first feature, third feature, and fifth feature are all really the same thing. They all deal with online gaming. So fuck them expanding to make it look better.

The second feature is bullshit. They just did that recently to screw the Silver users. Fuck them for that too.

The fourth and sixth (Parties and Netflix movies) are their most valid points. Though I can’t confirm it, I’m pretty sure you can join parties with a Silver membership, you just can’t play with people. So that’s really misleading if that’s the case. Netflix is an awesome feature, but it’s really absurd to pay Netflix on top of Microsoft. But whatever, their prerogative.

So really, outside of online gaming, I’m getting shit for my $60 a year. I’d like to request one, simple, easily-added, additional feature.

NO FUCKING ADS.

I am tired of booting up my Xbox 360, having 7 categories, and almost every single one of them only having one or two things I actually want to access. The rest of them are ads. Loads and loads of ads. Seriously, Microsoft, I don’t fucking care about Watchmen coming to XBLA. I don’t care about the latest IGN Strategize telling me how to unlock things I already have unlocked. Also, side note, what the fuck happened to journalistic objectivity? IGN on the 360? Seriously guys? What the fuck? Those guys are selling out faster than Metallica.

Anyway, back on track, if I’m paying for a service, I shouldn’t have to deal with ads everywhere. Increase the XBL Gold $10 a year if you have to. I really don’t want to deal with ads.

Fucking ridiculous.